Question:Can an ovel who completes aveilus during the sefira have a haircut? Introduction: The Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chayim Siman 493 Se’if 2) writes that the minhag is not to cut hair during the sefira until lag bo’omer. In Yoreh De’ah (Siman 390 Se’if 1) the Shulchan Aruch rules that an ovel is forbidden to cut hair for thirty days (“shloshim”). This applies specifically to aveilus for close relatives other than parents; regarding aveilus for parents an ovel is prohibited to cut hair even after shloshim, until “his friends shout at him”, i.e. until his friends and acquaintances are disturbed by his appearance and reprove him for looking unkempt. Discussion: The Zera Emes (Volume 1 Siman 67) discusses a situation of where an ovel completes his aveilus during sefiras ho’omer and rules that it is permitted for him to have a haircut during the sefira. The Zera Emes brings a precedent for this ruling from the Bach in Siman 531 who writes that it is permissible for an ovel who finishes shloshim on the 18th of Tammuz to have a haircut during the three weeks. The reasoning of the Bach is based on the halacha in Hilchos Aveilus that if a person is observing aveilus for one relative and before he completes the aveilus (shloshim) another relative of his is niftar there is a concession to thin his hair (in private) with a razor, but not with scissors (referred to as “tokfo aveilov”). The Bach extrapolates from the leniency of tokfo aveilov to a situation where a person finishes aveilus during bein hamtzorim and writes that if in a situation of tokfo aveilov where it ought to be ossur according to the din of the Gemoro to cut hair, there is somewhat of a concession to thin his hair with a razor when one period of aveilus runs into another period of aveilus, all the more so regarding sefiras ho’omer where the restriction of cutting hair is based on a minhag (and not the Gemoro) one can be lenient and even cut hair in the normal fashion (i.e. one does not need only to thin hair in an unusual manner). The conclusion of the Zera Emes is that although it is permissible, it is ideal to first perform hatoras nedorim “because this [refraining from cutting hair] is not a minhag accepted by the entire city”. In other words, if refraining from cutting hair would be a widespread and accepted minhag by the entire city then there would be little gain by performing hatoras nedorim because even if the individual is matir neder he is still constrained by the minhag hamokom. Therefore, it appears that nowadays where refraining from cutting hair during sefiras ho’omer is the accepted minhag in all places the Zera Emes would concede that there is no gain in performing hatoras nedorim because the widespread minhag obligates the individual to refrain from cutting hair (irrespective of performing hatoras nedorim). Conclusion: An individual who finishes shloshim during sefiras ho’omer is allowed to have a haircut. |
Aveilus
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